December 19, 2013

Christ Almighty!!!

Is the "C" word over yet?? Yes, I'm back to calling it that. I'm spent. I've been working, I've been sick, Lo's been sick, appointment after appointment, up early, to bed late, no money or time for the "C" word presents, I'm freezing and I'm cranky. That's been my month. I was all gung ho before, but now I just want it all to be over with so I can rest. So I don't have to go without the basics, like deodorant, just so I can buy presents for  my kids. You heard me right, I haven't worn deo in weeks!! I also haven't worn makeup either since I had what was probably the worst case of pink eye you've ever seen!!!! I am not even eye looked just like that. Then there's my teenager's pregnancy. That's right, the teenager is pregnant. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO MEEEEE!!! The best part of that? There is no best part. -_- But don't worry, she's "almost 18 and can totally do this on her own without any help from me". Did I mention I haven't worn deodorant in weeks? So all this sweating is just terrible for me and anyone within a 5 foot radius. And I am sweating!! Todd keeps saying......"We can't raise another baby. We can't raise another baby! WE CAN'T RAISE ANOTHERRRRRR BAYYYYYYBEEEEEE!!!!". I KNOW, TODD!! Just....breath......Nina. Just breath. It can't get any worse, right? While I was sitting on the toilet crying because of all this, and the fact that I stink and look like crap, I felt a great wave of calmness come over me and I swear I heard someone say "let go". And that is what I did, and this is what happened.......

I stopped worrying about the teenager and her pregnancy, it is her pregnancy and it is something she chose, so she can worry about it. Nothing I can do. I stopped worrying about money, and guess what happened? I was offered more hours. I stopped thinking about all the Christmas presents I couldn't buy. Guess what happened sister and her wife dropped off a bag full of toys for the kids. I started feeling good again. Good enough to shower, put on makeup and I even borrowed the boyfriend's deodorant. I may smell like a man, but I look pretty damn good again......for a grandmother. o.O


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