((sigh))

It's one of those days where nothing is going right. Dogs are sick, Lex is begging to stay home because he hates school, Lo is being very needy and it's the first day of Spring and we're covered in snow. I need sunshine, quiet, more cleaning materials and healthy dogs. I am trying to look forward to the happier days that I know are coming, but it's hard when everything piles on top of you at once. So what I am going to do is this, get off the computer, clean my house, give my dogs some medicine to help with the out of control diarrhea, give Lo some school work to do and then sit down and regroup while I fold laundry. Let's hope this day gets better and not worse.

Me~

Saving Money........

Picture from Camp Wander blog where you can grab the recipes for all sorts of goodies :)

I've had it with buying things that I can make myself. I started with cleaners. I stopped buying them! I make my own with vinegar and Dr. Bronner's Sal Suds. Works wonderfully, too, I might add. Now, on to detergents. I did the math (not really) and I can save myself a ton of money by making my own. I spend at least $40 a month in detergents alone. That's dishwasher and laundry detergents. I just spent $30 at Walmart on supplies to make my own, and it should last me a year. I will keep tabs on that and let you know exactly how long it lasts. I'm hoping this works out well. I have three elderly dogs and I'm doing laundry every damn day!! I'm not even kidding. Puke towels, pee towels, cleaning rags.....it's tiring, and expensive. If I had been smart I would have had them put in the divorce papers that my ex pay for the laundry! It's mostly the two older dogs who he had before we met that are making the messes. Getting old sucks.

So here I am, sitting in the kitchen, blogging, making my own soap and I can't help but feel like I should be singing Kumbaya or something like that. Seriously! Who am I?! ;)

Me~

Blah, Blah, Blah....

Let the spewing begin!!! We are still looking for a new place to live, no luck yet though. Very hard to find a place that will take three dogs. I refuse to let my ex put them in a shelter. One thing I regret about the divorce, not making him agree to actually taking the dogs to live with him. He was crafty though and put that he would take responsibility for them. -_- So yeah, I'm going to keep looking. They deserve to live out the rest of their lives in a home, with us, family. :)

We are hoping to find a place far away from where we are now, preferably in a town with a better school system. Don't even get me started on that. Lex is having a hard time, the teenager is having a hard time and no one seems to know what the Hell is going on. I want so badly to pull Lex from school and homeschooling him myself. Yes, it's that bad. I know I could do a better job, but taking him out of school and away from his friends at the almost end of the year seems unfair. He may like it, who knows! Lo is looking forward to kindergarten. We've been doing our own learning here and out and about. I signed her up with abcmouse.com and she loves it. :) I'm teaching her the alphabet, numbers, shapes and we're working on fine motor skills. We'll see where she's at when they do kindergarten screening.

I think I may have my plate almost full at the moment. I'm keeping myself busy with several projects. One is, of course, working at the store more just waiting on Boss Lady's baby. Any day now. :) The second is my photography. I got my website up and running, threesphotography.com. Now I'm selling Arbonne. I've been using it for a few years now and I love their products. I have gotten a few friends hooked on it already, so I might as well sell it.

I'm currently obsessed with pallets. Palletspalletspallets!!!!! I have two outside just waiting for my loving hands to make them in to something beautiful. Just waiting for this snow to melt and some warm weather. I feel like I will never be warm again. -_- I am so done with winter.

Me~

Moving...Moving....Moving.....Eventually

Todd and I want to move. We want a place that is just ours. We can start fresh! We need this. And also, we need a bedroom with a door. The kids share the upstairs with us, but it's an old attic with a small room with a door to the kids' room. We had to get creative and hand bells on the doors and we turn the monitor on....just in case. I don't want to traumatize my children by having them walk in on us, you know, making whoopie or whatever you call it when you're a grownup. So yeah, the hunt is on!! We're thinking of renting a crappy 3 bedroom apartment for a few years then buying a house. I want a farm. I want/need/gotta have chickens. And lots of them. I wonder if Polish chickens lay good eggs. I'm going to have to google that! Ok, just googled it and apparently they do, just not regularly. And also, there's a whole message board dedicated to Polish chickens. Unbelievable. Oh, and in case you were wondering, this is a Polish chicken.....

That thing is stylin'!!! Lex loves this picture. :) 

So yeah, life is good, busy, hectic and fun. We're doin' alright :)

Me~

I Can't Wait To NOT Have To Wear So Many Clothes.....

I'm over winter. Seriously, it can just be done now. I can't wait for tank tops, sandals and trips to the beach. I need sun damn it!! Not to mention I just need to get out of the house. Since Todd moved in I've gained a tiiiiiiny bit of weight. Just a tiny bit. O.O I started exercising again. I usually wait till April or May, depending on how warm it is, but thanks to Todd I'm having to bust out the ankle weights early. Thanks, babe. -_- Luckily he likes curvy women. ;)

So for now I'm busy trying to eat better, complain less, sleep more and workout every day. This is no easy task, I tell ya!!! I like staying up late, eating lots of food and then complaining about how tired I am and how bloated I feel. LOL!!

Me~

Contrary To Popular Belief, I Am NOT A Profession Zit Popper

I have three dogs, a cat and two fish who are immortal. My ex had two of the tree dogs when I first met him, so technically they aren't really mine. Chewy, he's mine. He was a Valentine's Day gift 11 years ago. My grumpy old man is all mine. I love his stinky breath and the way he likes to sleep right between Todd and I in the bed to keep us from touching. It's so cute. One of the downfalls of having a pet is that they get old, and things start going wrong. Like today, when I found something on his BUTT!! Looks like a hemorrhoid to me, but the groomer said it may be a cyst. o.O She wants me to put hot compresses on it to see if it goes away or bursts. OMG!! NO!! I almost threw up in my mouth when she said that. No way I'm forcing a hot compress onto my dog's butt!! So it's off to the vet's office in a couple of days to see what they can do for him. They're the professionals!! Let them pops Chewy's giant ass zit, I want no part of it. Ew.

Me~

Another Year Gone........

I blinked, and now it's 2013. Last year was full of so much craziness! I am hoping this year is better, slower. Todd and I are thinking about moving this Summer. Kevin wants us to stay here and buy this house, but honestly, I don't want to. So much work needs to be done here and I'm not in love with this house anymore. I will miss it, but I'm not going to mourn when we leave. We want something of our own, even if we just rent for a few years and then buy. It'll be worth the wait. I've decided that I want a house with a huge yard so I can have some chickens. Yes, chickens! I've always wanted to have little chickens running around, but never had the room. :) And eggs, lots and lots of eggs!! 

So the purging has begun. Very slowly, but surely, I am packing things up, donating things and trying to get things going. I had forgotten how nice it is to have an extra pair of hands to help out around the house. Todd has really stepped up when I've needed him to, I appreciate that more than I could ever tell him. Being a single mom was not easy! I don't think I want to do that again. Ever. LOL!!

I start working overtime here real soon. Boss Lady is having a baby in March! So glad to see my friends having babies so I don't have to. Vasectomy is my favorite word. ;) I have three kids, Todd has two, we're all set. Since seeing Boss Lady's baby bump, Lo has been obsessed with babies in the belly, and am I going to have anymore, when will she have a baby, and so on and so forth. She's also been asking when Todd and I are going to get married. NEVER!!! I am not going to fix something that's not broken. We're perfectly happy the way we are. And plus, we were both married before and look what happened to those marriages! All set.

I've been thinking about this coming year and all the new things to look forward to, and I'm happy. Very, very happy. I just hope Life doesn't see that as a challenge and throw me for a loop!! o.O

Me~

So There's This Guy Named Moooooog....And He's Kinda Hilarious

I joined Twitter before Twitter was cool, and that was a loooong time ago. I didn't have many "friends" in the beginning, but the few I did have were all pretty damn funny. Then one day, about 2 years ago, I saw that Moooooog35 was stalking me.....I mean.....following me. So I checked this person out, like I did with all my new stalkers, and I was surprised to have a new real follower, and not a porn bot trying to get me to "be their sex kitten". He may actually be trying to do that still, but so far it hasn't worked, so I think I'm safe. Anyway! My friend Moooooog35, or Rodney, has a new book out. Yes, an actual book! Not porn!! I know!! Amazing, right?! I can assure you it will be awesome! Jenny McCarthy did a review and said "A hysterical book written by a man with no filter, a vasectomy and a name like 'Rod'? I'm all over it!". Yes, she really did say that. So what I think you should do is this....buy it. Buy it now before it's gone! Here are the different links to where you can find it.....

http://bit.ly/12o6h8N Amazon

http://bit.ly/ZpoiVk Kindle

http://bit.ly/UIgJBw B&N

And of course, so and "Like" his Facebook fan page HERE. Yeah.....because we all need a little Moooooog in our lives. ;)

Me~

I Think I've Got It.....Finally

One would think that finding a recipe for an all natural cleaner would be easy, but no, it was not. I have been reading, researching and trying to figure this all out. Not easy for someone with ADD, three kids and a job. I finally found a website that was written just for me!! They wrote it like they were talking to a 5 year old. That is exactly what I need. The website is called Keeper Of The Home. Head over and check out of some their awesome articles. Anyway. I found this place just in the nick of time, too!! Poor Lo seems to becoming more and more allergic to everything I clean with. I'm down to vinegar and water. And now the soaps I have been using on her are irritating her as well. UGH!!! It got so bad that I decided to stop using any and all soaps on her until I found something purely plant based. And I did, finally. I stumbled upon Dr. Bronner's soaps while looking for a Castile soap to add to my new all natural cleaners. I looked through all their soaps and found the perfect one for Lo. Now maybe I can bathe the poor kid and actually get her totally clean. :)

Me~

Sloooooowly But Suuuuuuuurely Looooooosing My Miiiiiiind.......

I've got too much on my plate. I'm losing my mind. There. I said it. My man thinks I'm Super Mom, but I am failing, miserably. I am behind on the dishes, laundry and cleaning. Granted, I've been working a lot, but this has never been a problem before. I think I need to adjust to having him living with us. It's kind of throwing me off. I have one extra person in the house who needs/wants/loves spending time with me as much as the others. So, just to clarify, I have 3 dogs, a kitten, 3 kids and now a man and they ALL want to spend time with me or need something from me. :) I have a full house and a full heart. I just need to get a new, newer schedule going. Getting a maid would be much easier, but I don't see that happening any time soon. ;)

Me~

I'm Going For It......

There's nothing like someone losing a job, having no health insurance and being broke as Hell to light a fire under one's ass. I love photography, I always have. Now I'm taking it one step further and starting my own business. I'm no professional, but I do have a really good eye and an even better camera. I already have 3 photo shoots lined up, and I hope to get my cards made and passed out within the next few weeks. I made a Facebook page already and I'm currently working on a website. Here's my Facebook page......Threes Photography. I'm very excited about this! I'm hoping to take a class next year to learn more, but for now I'm just doing what I love to do, making people happy. :)

Me~

The Not So Natural Mommy.....

I used to look at Moms that would make their own cleaners, cook like they actually knew what they were doing and think to myself "Ppft! Morons".....but then I became a Mom myself and now I do all those things. Well, I used to. I slacked for a while there, became cheap because I had to, but now it's different. Now I have to again. Lo loves taking bathes and naturally I scrubbed the shit outta that tub with bleach and other various trendy cleaners. Then she got a yeast infection and it was a bad one. We had no insurance, but her pedi was kind enough to tell me what to do without having to bring her in. They usually run their course in a week if you're careful and keep things as natural as possible. So I went back to using apple cider vinegar and water to clean. God I forgot how awesome that stuff works. And my hands are super soft!! Can't beat that! I found a website that lists all the wonderful things apple cider is good for. Here ya go.....enjoy!!

Me~

When It Rains, It Pours....

I hate being negative, so I won't be. Let's just say that it's been raining and pouring all over my life lately. Ex lost his job, which means we lost our health insurance, so of course Lo gets a yeast infection and of course my teenager's meds cost $140 dollars and of course I fell down the stairs and can barely move. I am begging the universe to please, please, please keep everyone healthy. PLEASE!! I can deal with my back, I can scrape by and borrow money for the teenager's meds and I can keep Lo's yeast infection from getting worse, but anything else, well we just can't afford that right now. You know, health insurance was something I kind of took for granted. I mean, I was very grateful for it, I knew we were lucky, but I never in a million years thought I'd be without it. Never! Just goes to show you that anything can be taken from you in the blink of an eye. So now, I sit here thanking the universe that my children aren't deathly ill and need constant medical attention, or tons of meds. We're very fortunate that it's minor things, and I hope to keep it that way. :)

Me~

And Then.......Reality Set In....

Seems like yesterday everything was "normal" and the biggest problem I had was "which one do I get the kids for Christmas? An XBox or a Wii". Now I'm all like...."HOLY SHIT MY EX LOST HIS JOB!!" My main source of income was child support, and now I'm not even sure when and if I'm going to be getting any. I am not working full-time just yet because Lo isn't in school and we couldn't afford preschool or daycare, so we decided that I would stay in the house and live off the child support until she was in kindergarten. Now it looks like we're going to have to figure something out. I know what you're saying right now..."Your ex isn't working, make him watch Lo while you work!". I wish it were that easy. He was in the radio business for 20 years and he was very, very popular. Right now he's trying to figure out where he wants to be, he's meeting with people every other day and he's working on putting together a demo to send out to radio stations and agents. So yeah, he's not just sitting on his ass. We're hoping he isn't out of work for too long. 

So for now I'm just trying to keep my hopes up and not worry too much. Worrying never solved a damn thing. I started working on my photography website last week. Very hard to do at home because my computer is trying to die on me. NOT YET, COMPUTER!! NOT! YET! After I get the website looking halfway decent I'm going to make up some cards to pass out. So yeah, anyone need a photographer? Will shoot for food. ;) 

Me~

The Bossiest 4 Year Old You'll Ever Meet

When I was pregnant with Lola we had no idea if we were having a girl or a boy up until the day before she was born. She barely moved in the womb, I had no symptoms at all and my stomach was the only thing that got big. Really big! After a very traumatic 12 hours, I gave birth to the sweetest, BIGGEST baby I had ever seen. We only stayed in the hospital for a little over 24 hours because she was soooooo good at nursing and she was obviously very healthy, so they let us leave early. She continued to be the best baby ever. Sleeping through the night from the get-go, nursing was so easy with her, she never cried, never even made a sound, even when she was hungry or needed a change. She was my last baby, and I had hit the jackpot!! Years passed and we struggled with a few issues. She didn't walk till she was 2 1/2 due to a fever that set her back months, constipation was her nightmare and she had a brother who loved to treat her like a doll. She was such a good baby/little girl, that I didn't even mind carrying all of her 25 pounds around till she was able to walk unassisted. I can still see the look of pure happiness on her chubby little face, reaching up to me with her chubby little arms and clinging on as tight as she could. It was blissful. Just look at her little face!!!

She was always this happy. Always! So don't ask me what happened, because the little 4 year old living in my house is not the same little girl. She's mean, she's bossy and just down right rude sometimes. She has her good days and she has her bad days. When she's having a good day she's sweet and funny and so flippin' cut I could squeeze her to death! But when she's having a bad day, forget it!! It's horrible. She will tell complete strangers to "Stop looking at me! I don't like people!!' O.O I have learned over this past year that if shes having a bad day the best way to handle her is with lots and lots of love. Lots of love. It can be very difficult at times, either because I'm already having a bad day, or I'm tired or I just don't feel like dealing with her mood swings, but I reach deep down into my patience reserve and I do it. Let me share some of the various moods of my Lo........

This is Thinking Lo....

This is my Cheese Lo, when she lets me take her picture and actually smiles.......

 

Upset Lo.......

 

Trouble Lo.....she's thinking of new trouble

 

Pissed off Lo. I said no to her here. Lo does not like the word No.

 

Pretty Lo

 

And my Sweet Lo....

 



Her moods vary. This week she's been Pissed off Lo. Nothing I say is right and she hates everything. ((sigh)) Luckily she's so damn cute. I swear it's a defensive mechanism

Me~

A New Addition.......

NO! Not a baby! AHHHH! We have a new kitten! Well, Lex has a new kitten. She's  his "baby girl, love bug, Flufferton". Yes, he named her Fluffy. Of course!! Can you tell he's smitten? The boy is so in love with this cat that she's the first thing he runs to when he gets home from school. And she's just great!! Such a good kitten, too. She's sweet, cuddly and isn't afraid of the kids. Just perfect.......

And yes, she was hugging Lex in that last picture. The cuteness almost killed me. :) Everyone is so happy that we have a new kitten, but all I keep thinking about is how many mice she's going to kill for me. ;)

Me~

How Long Do I Have To Raise The Teenager?

Seriously, how long? She can check herself into the hospital without my consent. Her doctors don't have to tell me a thing about what's going on in her medical life. She can go behind my back and get pregnancy tests and STD tests and I can't say a thing about it. Well, I could, but legally I don't have the right to anymore. BUT, I have to deal with all her drama, attitude and mood swings. I'm not gonna lie, she has gotten a lot better since she started taking her meds regularly, but still, she's a teenager. A teenager with mental health issues. A teenager that thinks she's grown, but can't even do her own laundry or cook herself a meal without almost setting the house on fire. So yeah, she's a handful, to say the least. As far as getting her help goes, we're doing our best. Not easy when our insurance only covers certain doctors in certain towns, and those doctors aren't accepting new patients. Oh, and get this......she's still considered a child, so she has to see a pediatric psychiatrist. It's frustrating, it really is. Some days I just want to scream. Other days I actually find myself thinking that she should live with her grandmother if she hates me so damn much. Not that I would ever let that happen, but when you feel so helpless and beaten down by your own child, then you tend to think negative thoughts. Yesterday, I wanted to clean the porch so we could eat out there again, and the whole time out there I cried. I just let it all out. Weeks of stress and trouble with my teenager just flooded out of me, and it felt good. I've decided to do that more often, cry it out. I tend to hold things in, stand strong and don't let anything get me down. Sometimes though, I think it's best to let it out. I sure felt better afterwards. :)

Me~

I. Am. Exhausted.

I'm changing my name to Ms. Exhausted Casey A. Between work, the house, the kids, the pets, hospital visits, more work, laundry and breathing, I have no time at all to myself. I am only able to update right now because Lo is sick and I'm sitting here watching her sleep peacefully and hoping she wakes up feeling better. School hasn't even started yet and we're already battling nasty bugs. Wonderful. It seems that I just can't catch a break lately. One thing goes right, five other things go wrong. Found out last week that someone stole my identity and used it to run up a $1,500 heating bill and a $600 electric bill. Luckily my ex is a nice guy and kept everything in his name until I get things figured out. What a flippin' mess. My new man and I have been talking about him moving in within the next month or so. That is wonderful and very exciting. Again, one good thing happens and then I got dumped on again. My teenager had an episode two weeks ago and Todd and I had to drive her to the ER where she checked herself into the hospital. Now that she's 16 I'm pretty much only needed to sign papers and pay the co pays. No one would tell me anything at all. Nothing! Todd and I sat in the coldest room ever just waiting for them to find her a bed in the psych ward. It was horrible. She was the one who finally told me that she stopped taking her meds. ((sigh)) If she hadn't of told me I never would have known! So, FYI, if your kid is 16 the doctors don't have to tell you shit! Anyway, I went to visit her every day she was there until she checked herself out. I think being on the adult ward freaked her out. She's been home and has been taking her meds regularly. Let's hope it stays that way.

So yeah, life is hectic. Wonderful, but hectic. My teenager is on the mend, school starts soon, I still love my job, my ex and I are getting along nicely, and my new man is becoming a huge part of our lives. Life is good.

Me~

Slackin'.......And Not Just With Blogging

Ever since this whole divorce thing started I've noticed that I've been slacking in a few areas. What I feed my children is one of them. I used to have plenty of time to make a healthy meal with all organic ingredients, I could spend hours in the kitchen backing bread, making sweets and trying new things. Now, I'm lucky if I have time to make anything other than noodles and peas. And as far as buying mostly organic...yeah, that's not happening. Money is just too, too tight right now. Child support kicks in on the first, so I'll be able to do my finances and see what I'm looking at as far as how much money I'll be able to spend on groceries. Right now I'm not getting very much money to work with, so I've had to really watch what I spend. I'm hoping I'll have a little more to spend on fresh produce and mostly organic things the kids eat all the time, like yogurt, milk, bread, peanut butter, noodles and such. It's not easy, but I'm trying to get better at it. I'm just so sick of them eating the same thing all the time and I want to be able to provide them with better options. No more excuses! I'm doing this.

Me~

Summer....Va...Cation....Now I Panic

Now that school is out, what do I do with these kids??? My teenager is easy.....she's going to work and will most likely be out with friends all the time. Lex is such a sleepy head lately, I doubt I'll be able to get him up and going any time before 10am. Lola, well Lola doesn't like to move much. I've been wracking my brain thinking of things to do this Summer. Here's what I have so far.......

• Beach.....and lots of it
• Summer studying on Tuesdays and Wednesdays since I work those days anyways
• The Children's Museum in Boston
• Davis' Farmland
• Zoo
• Going to different lakes
• Spending a weekend at a hotel somewhere (Lex loves that)
• Lots of movie nights
• Catch some fireflies :)
• Lots of playdates

That's all I have so far. Lex has lots of Summer school work to do, so our Tuesdays and Wednesdays are full. I'm thinking any rainy days will be movie days. I'd like to do a kids cooking day with them, I bet they'd love that. My teenager will be babysitting the kids from 8am-1pm on Tuesdays and Fridays, which will give her some spending money. I'm hoping to get her in to help out at a shelter near where I work. The place is so full and the woman works herself to the bone keeping the place clean and taking care of the animals. It'll be good for Raven. That's all I can think of right now. I'm not good with this planning crap. So yeah, feel free to chime in and give me some ideas!!

Me~