Where The Hell Is My Maid?!

I swear to God I am going to fire her when I see her. The house is a mess, the laundry needs to be folded and put away. The floors haven't been done all week. The dishes are piling up and the animals need to be fed. What the Hell do I pay her for? Not to show up? Not to clean? To sit around and do nothing. Apparently so! The nerve!

 I keep having to remind myself that I, in fact, do not have a maid. It's just me. When I remember this I get really sad. The fantasy that I have someone to do all this for me is such an inviting one. I never want to leave that dream. Just think about it.......you leave for work and 8 hours later you come home to a clean house! How fantastic would that be?? ((sigh)) But I don't, and I probably never will. So, I have to make my daily list of things that need to be done, have breakfast and then get to it. Oh the grind!!!!!!!

Me~

The "C" Word

I refuse to say it. I just can't bring myself to talk about the "C" word. Not before November! I mean, we aren't even through Halloween yet and I am already seeing the "C" word decorations up?! WTF is that?! Are we in such a rush to get there that we have to start in October? Poor Thanksgiving, you barely see any decorations for that holiday. I mean yeah, a few Autumn decorations posing as Thanksgiving decorations, but we all know what they really are. I think Thanksgiving should go back to the way it was celebrated! I loved that holiday when I was a kid. I wasn't much of a Halloween lover, I was a scaredy cat. It's true. I couldn't wait for all the scary decorations to be gone. That there was something I've never told anyone, because I am supposed to be a bad ass. We'll keep that a secret, k?

So here we are, October 16th, and we are already in full "C" word mode. Commercials, the stores have the fake trees out already and the decorations are blinding me as I walk down the isle to get my tampons. Something really needs to be done about this.

Me~

Halloween.....

I still can't believe it's October. Where the Hell did this year go? I feel like it was just yesterday that we were celebrating New Years with Todd.....

Yeah, good times!! Side note: Don't fall asleep near us, we will do things like this to you. Anyway. It's that time of the year when I decorate the house, the yard and prepare costumes for my kids. This yeah Lex wants to be Slender Man. O.O Don't ask. Lo wants to be Minnie Mouse, not as scary, but very cute. I'm going as myself.....scary.

Ok, I Lied....I am SO Not Ready For Winter

I'm cold. My house is cold. My kids are cold. My pets are cold. And I refuse to turn the heat on. Do you know how many times a day I say "Put a sweater on!"? A lot! My poor kids are sleeping with three blankets because I am too cheap to turn the heat on. Well, not cheap, just frugal. Winter is coming and what little oil we have I need to save save save till I can afford to buy more. I wash all my clothes in cold water, I limit showers, I make sure everyone does the dishes the right way (my way is the only right way, if you're not doing it my way, you're doing it wrong and I will make sure you know it!) and I am not turning the heat on till November. I flat out refuse. But damn I'm cold!

Me~

Sweaters and Flip Flops.....

Yes, that is me........I wear sweaters and flip flops......at the same time! My body is so confused. It wants to be cold, but the sweater is saying..."No, no you're not cold. You're warm and cozy and don't need the heat on, silly!". I love this weather. I like being warm and cold at the same time. I like the comfort of having my feet free and my arms warm. So yes, I love the Fall!! It's time to start baking bread again, something I refuse to do in the Summer. I want to bake cookies, lasagna and sip on tea in the evenings and not sweat while I do it. I think it's amazing how my mind can switch so easily. Just a few weeks ago I was fighting the end of Summer, and now I'm rushing head first into Fall. I think I'm going to fill my closet with cozy sweater and more flip flops for as long as I can.

Me~

Happy Fall, Y'all!!!!!!!!!

Yes, I am just a bit excited about Fall. I love the cold mornings, colorful trees, warm sunshine, apple picking and of course all the pumpkin flavored everything! McDonald's now has a pumpkin latte that is SOOOOO good!!!! You have to try it. Anyway! The kids have been doing crafts so I can decorate the house. I go to the dollar store and buy cheap things so it's easy and affordable. The kids love the Fall. Lex likes that he can wear his Creeper hoodie and not be hot. Lo loves her footsie pajamas and cuddling. One of the downfalls is that my poor old dogs have a hard time walking when it's cold. Chewy has degenerative disc disease  and both dogs arthritis. So the cold is tough on them. I have upped their glucosamine to daily instead of weekly. Gotta get a jump start on that before my poor dogs can't walk. :( Other than that we are ready for Fall and looking forward to all the fun activities, without the sweat. ;)

Me~

School Drop Off.....

I like to take advantage of the nice weather and walk my kids to school. And by walk I mean drive to the school, park down the street and walk them the rest of the way, which is totally not allowed because they are tearing down half of the school to build a new one and there is no parking, which means no parking on the street either. Whatever. Try and stop me! Anyway, so we have our morning routine, I drive, we get out and walk, we chat, hold hands, talk about how good they are going to be (Lo!!), and every morning my son insists on me standing at his classroom window and dance for him. Yes, yes he does. And yes, yes I do. Every. Morning. He thinks it's hilarious, I think I'm going to get arrested one day. I do these silly things for them because one day they won't want me doing things like this, they will think I'm "embarrassing" or "stupid", so am taking full advantage of it now before I lose them when they're "too cool" to be seen with Mom. :D

Me~

My Lo......The Drama Queen

When my teenager was little I thought "There is no way anyone can be as dramatic as this child". Universe, that was not a challenge. My Lo is 5 now and she isn't annoying dramatic, she's just very dramatic. Everything is all about love, cuddles, how much she misses me, how she can't live without me.....it's cute, to an extent. I don't mind the over play of love and emotions when we're at home, but when we are in the middle of morning routine and she starts, it can drag on. For example.....every morning I ask the kids if they want home lunch or school lunch, and every morning I get the same response....Lex: "School lunch!!!", and Lo: "Home lunch, because I like to eat the food you make for me with love because I miss you so much when I'm at school and I love you, Mom!!" A simple "Home lunch!" would have been just fine.. If I don't stop her in her tracks then she goes on and on and on and on and then drop off is Hell. Don't get me wrong, I love her to death! But I cannot feed into her dramatics every morning, we have a routine and if I don't keep it, she will no do well. Last week she was refusing to go into the school, the teachers had to pry her off of me and take her to class. That's a terrible thing for a mother, and child, to have to go through. So Lex had the brilliant idea that he would walk her to her class every morning. :) My little hero. And so far, it's working out great. This week has gone by so smoothly. Next, we are going to transition into car drop off. There will be a few rainy days that will be perfect for that. I want her to go to school happy, not sad and distressed because she misses me. I also don't want her to think I'm dropping her off and running away. :( And seriously, how could I run away from a face like this..........

Me~

Clean Eating.......

I am on a mission to change the way we eat around here, and if you know my kids, you know how hard that is. I'm easy, I like change! I also like that this means I may lose a few pounds. ;) I've decided to try clean eating. I actually started last year, but when money got really tight I had to cheat, now that the kids are in school full time I can work more and I am able to spend more money on food. Clean eating is basically eating fresh food. If I buy snacks I make sure they ingredient list is short, or the snacks be organic. I'm all for organic, but GOD, why the Hell is it so damn expensive? Yeah, you pay for what you get, I know!! Anyway, I like to make sure my fruit, milk, bread, eggs and veggies are organic. Those are things my kids eat every day. Their snacks, well, let's just say that I am still trying to get them into healthy alternatives to Oreos and fruit rollups. :/ I tried buying some organic gummy treats, and OH MY GOD were they GROSS! Lex and I almost threw up! Here's a little hint to all the organic all natural companies out there......you want kids to eat your stuff, make it taste good!!

Dinners.......I make every from scratch, if possible. Mac-n-cheese is a huge hit around here, so I always buy Annie's, and I always use whole grain wheat pasta, or veggie pasta. The kids love the color and I love that there are veggies in them. Don't tell them that though. ;) I try and make sure I offer the kids a lot of foods. If I put a lot of food on the table they think it's a "feast" and they eat, a lot! That makes me happy. Now, if I can only get their father to cook for them when he has them. -_-

Me~

And The Panic Begins........

I hate sending my kids to school. I hate it. I can't tell them that though. I try to put a smile on my face, send them off to school with a big hug and a kiss and lots of "I love you!!"s. The truth is, I'm a wreck being away from them. I worry constantly, I have mini panic attacks and I cry. Yes, I cry. It's sad, really, and totally not normal. I talked to my boyfriend about this and we both agree that I can't go on like this. This is only the first week of school!! And no, I don't think it will get better. Every day they are in school I drive by there at least three times. The reality is that they have to go to school. I have to work. But I hate it. I'm sitting here breaking out in hives just thinking about it. I'm going to have to go back on anti-anxiety meds. I thought I was past that, but no, I am no. :( I have thought that maybe a diet change would help, but how they Hell do I stop using sugar or wheat?? My friend Carly over at Twinkling Along has done just that and says her moods are better, she's slimmer and happier. For now, I'll take the drugs and slowly work on my diet. ((sigh)) Wish me luck. I'm off to run some errands and drive by my kids' school a few times. :(

Me~

The End Of Summer...........

Summer is coming to an end, even though it's still hot as Hell outside, and today I am taking the kids to the Woodstock Fair to celebrate the end of Summer. I'm hoping the weather cooperates. I'm going to miss Summer. We've had a really good time this year.....beaches, lakes, parties and family time. I won't miss the heat and humidity though! I am a Fall girl through and through. I'm looking forward to wearing bulky sweaters, boots and hearing the leaves crunch beneath my feet, apple picking, pumpkin picking, hay rides, cool morning, warm sun, apple pies and our first night starting a fire in our fire place. I am soooo looking forward to that! Oh, and footsie pajamas. Those are my favorite. There is something so cute about seeing my littles all cozy and warm. :) Oh, and cuddles, lots of lots of cuddles.

Me~

Back To School.....

Moms everyone rejoice with the beginning of a new school year, but not this Mom. I don't like sending my kids to school. I want so desperately to homeschool them, but time and money just won't allow it. I'm hoping that Lex does well at his new school, and I hope Lo's teacher is prepared for the little whirlwind that is about to walk through her door. My ex and I are giving the public school system one more chance, if Lex still doesn't do well then I have a few more options I can look into. One will be costly, but I think we could swing it. I'll be working my ass off, but it will be worth it! The other option is that we homeschool him. We'll see! Fingers crossed he does well. :)

Me~

Sleep Training....

Not my kids, my kids go to bed by themselves with no help. I'm talking about my boyfriend's 4 year old daughter. He sleeps with them while they are here and that is a big no no in this house. She is not a baby anymore, she needs to learn to go to sleep on her own. Oh, and no thumb sucking here. Sorry, but as a former dental assistant, I cannot allow that in my home. She will learn, we will have countless sleepless nights, but she will learn. They always do.

Me~

Broken Mommy......

I fractured my ribs the other day. Landed right on the side of the tub on the metal part. Good times, people. Good times. Todd had to drive me to the ER yesterday morning. I would just like to take a moment to thank all the nurses out there who go above and beyond. I did not see one doctor yesterday, two nurses took care of me, and they were making rounds to each room! They are way under paid. Anyway, two x-rays and a couple of percocets later, I was ready to go home. I popped those bad boys like they were candy, took a 5 hour nap, got up, popped some more and then went back to bed. Woke up this morning feeling a lot better. Hopefully this will heal quickly.

The kids are all concerned, especially Lola. She's such a caring little girl. She has been helping me around the house, asking me if I feel ok, do I need to lay down......so sweet. I'm taking my time and going really slow. Not something I am used to, but if I want to get better quick I need to learn to stop, breathe and relax. :)

Me~

Kids, Kids, Kids And Ever MOOOOOORE kids........

Dating someone with kids can be tough. I've been with Todd for over a year now and his kids have been coming over one night a week for almost a year. It's challenging, especially because I'm done with the "little kid" phase. You know what I'm talking about.....the nose picking, tantrum throwing, thumb sucking, crying over nothing phase. My kids are waaaaaaaay past that! It's hard establishing new rules to kids who do pretty much whatever they want at their house. Sammy says jump, you say how high. Spencer cries, you coddle him. That shit does not fly here. You say please and thank you, no thumb sucking or using furniture as slides and trampolines. You cry because someone said boo to you, I ask you to calm down and tell me what's wrong and stop the crying. It's been a very long road but I think they are finally realizing that we have new rules here, and you follow those rules or else. Yes, I am that Mom. Before you go and say "OMG you're a monster!! How could you?!" let me just tell you this........my children know how to behave, they are respectful of other's personal space and their belongings. They share nicely and listen when I have something to say......and I don't ever have to spank someone. Good parenting isn't about doing what's easy, it's about doing what's right even if it's hard. I have been parenting for 17 years and it is hard, very hard, not to just give in because it's easier to deal with than to "fight". So yeah, I am strict, but you know what, it works.

Me~

Moved, Summer, Loss Of A Pet and Learning.....

We have moved into out new home, a huge second floor apartment two towns over from our old place. We've been here for a month and a half, and it's still looks only half finished. Some boxes laying around, my office area is in dire need of a chair and someone to organize it. I've been too busy to do much and honestly, it's too hot to even move on most days, let alone do work around the house. I have to finish painting the kids' room, the office and the hallway, hang pictures, organize everything, figure out what goes in the attic and what stays. ((sigh)) I love our new place though, it just feels good. Todd and I may stay for more than just a year. And plus, we want to try the fireplace out.

In the middle of all this moving, summertime fun and craziness, we lost a pet. Our sweet Molly went to sleep Monday night and never woke up. I knew it was coming, but nothing can prepare you for the death of a pet. She was 13 years old, she had Addison's Disease, liver failure and a heart murmur. We were so lucky to have had her for as long as we did. I miss her so bad. The kids dealt with it very well. We got her ashes back last week and they made a spot for her right next to our cat Mina who passed away 3 years ago. I don't know how I'm going to make it through three more losses. One of the downfalls of having pets, you become too attached. :(

Through all of this craziness I have learned a few things.....

1.) I hate moving

2.) I will only move one more time and that is it!

3.) I need to learn to not worry so much.

4.) I am no good at organizing.

5.) I really need a maid.

Me~

Blogging Should Be Easy......

But it isn't. Especially when my life has been consumed by trying to find a place to live, a place that will allow three dogs and a cat. Let me tell you something, that is not easy. Not one damn bit. BUT, I did it. I found us a new home. This is currently how it looks.........

I don't know who left me in charge of getting this place together, but they must have been crazy. I am terrible at organizing. That gene completely missed me altogether. It might help if I get off the computer and actually tried to get things done. ;)

Me~

((sigh))

It's one of those days where nothing is going right. Dogs are sick, Lex is begging to stay home because he hates school, Lo is being very needy and it's the first day of Spring and we're covered in snow. I need sunshine, quiet, more cleaning materials and healthy dogs. I am trying to look forward to the happier days that I know are coming, but it's hard when everything piles on top of you at once. So what I am going to do is this, get off the computer, clean my house, give my dogs some medicine to help with the out of control diarrhea, give Lo some school work to do and then sit down and regroup while I fold laundry. Let's hope this day gets better and not worse.

Me~

Saving Money........

Picture from Camp Wander blog where you can grab the recipes for all sorts of goodies :)

I've had it with buying things that I can make myself. I started with cleaners. I stopped buying them! I make my own with vinegar and Dr. Bronner's Sal Suds. Works wonderfully, too, I might add. Now, on to detergents. I did the math (not really) and I can save myself a ton of money by making my own. I spend at least $40 a month in detergents alone. That's dishwasher and laundry detergents. I just spent $30 at Walmart on supplies to make my own, and it should last me a year. I will keep tabs on that and let you know exactly how long it lasts. I'm hoping this works out well. I have three elderly dogs and I'm doing laundry every damn day!! I'm not even kidding. Puke towels, pee towels, cleaning rags.....it's tiring, and expensive. If I had been smart I would have had them put in the divorce papers that my ex pay for the laundry! It's mostly the two older dogs who he had before we met that are making the messes. Getting old sucks.

So here I am, sitting in the kitchen, blogging, making my own soap and I can't help but feel like I should be singing Kumbaya or something like that. Seriously! Who am I?! ;)

Me~

Blah, Blah, Blah....

Let the spewing begin!!! We are still looking for a new place to live, no luck yet though. Very hard to find a place that will take three dogs. I refuse to let my ex put them in a shelter. One thing I regret about the divorce, not making him agree to actually taking the dogs to live with him. He was crafty though and put that he would take responsibility for them. -_- So yeah, I'm going to keep looking. They deserve to live out the rest of their lives in a home, with us, family. :)

We are hoping to find a place far away from where we are now, preferably in a town with a better school system. Don't even get me started on that. Lex is having a hard time, the teenager is having a hard time and no one seems to know what the Hell is going on. I want so badly to pull Lex from school and homeschooling him myself. Yes, it's that bad. I know I could do a better job, but taking him out of school and away from his friends at the almost end of the year seems unfair. He may like it, who knows! Lo is looking forward to kindergarten. We've been doing our own learning here and out and about. I signed her up with abcmouse.com and she loves it. :) I'm teaching her the alphabet, numbers, shapes and we're working on fine motor skills. We'll see where she's at when they do kindergarten screening.

I think I may have my plate almost full at the moment. I'm keeping myself busy with several projects. One is, of course, working at the store more just waiting on Boss Lady's baby. Any day now. :) The second is my photography. I got my website up and running, threesphotography.com. Now I'm selling Arbonne. I've been using it for a few years now and I love their products. I have gotten a few friends hooked on it already, so I might as well sell it.

I'm currently obsessed with pallets. Palletspalletspallets!!!!! I have two outside just waiting for my loving hands to make them in to something beautiful. Just waiting for this snow to melt and some warm weather. I feel like I will never be warm again. -_- I am so done with winter.

Me~